Wanting a baby

Tap. Tap. Tap. Is this thing on?

Seriously, dear readers, I oh-so-casually drop "get pregnant" into my list of New Year's resolutions here and not a single comment about it?

Hmmm...perhaps it is only news of an actual pregnancy that elicits comments.

(I'm not.)

But, I want to be.

Almost all our friends with kids had their first child after us and has had or will be having a second child before us. I hate that at this point Lucas will be approximately 4 years older than a future sibling. I mean, first we stick him with a crappy birth date then this?

I know, I know, it is fine for siblings to be several years apart. I'm sure Lucas has gotten many benefits from being an only child for this long. But, when I thought about our family, I just always thought that any children would be closer in age.

In my ideal world, we would have gotten preggers this past summer. But, a little thing called ITP put a big wrench into those plans. Back in August, I inquired about getting pregnant and got this response: "Well, if you do, we'll certainly deal with it. But, we strongly recommend you wait."

And so we waited and I continued to ask.

In early December my platelet count came in just below normal, which was a very dramatic increase for me. I'm praying that it will be at that level or even a little higher at my next bloor draw and if it is then that will be my green light.

I'll still be considered a high risk pregnancy because pregnancy in itself has the potential to lower your platelet count. But, that just means that I'll be monitored very closely we'll deal with any possible complications as they come.

With Lucas, I was blessed to get pregnant quickly (very quickly--is that TMI?) but wanting a baby and being told to wait certainly has given me just a hint of what it must feel like to deal with infertility.